Two Year’s
It’s crazy how fast time flies and how things progress.
It marks two years… Two years of losing my job and my self-identity. Two years of falling into pieces and trying to fix me. Two years of lost friendships and heartbreak. Two years of confusion with the relationship and clarity. For two years, I wake up to live another day and struggle to find the best day of my life. I was trapped in my past emotions and finding them difficult to overcome.
The only way I found love was through pleasing people since my childhood. I lost my mom when I was just 9 years old. I spend my life in pleasing my family, friends, co-workers kept myself at the last. I was focusing more on other’s happiness. In the whole process people started taking advantage of me. I kept hurting myself and my feelings. When I started reflecting on my life, I realized that I had given the power to people and circumstances to dominate and adjust what I knew was the truth. I did not have anyone who could explain what I was experiencing.
I never got the help I truly needed. While I was there for everyone, I
knew that a part of me died that day, and that was enough reason to give life a second chance. That was the first time in my life I decided to stand up for myself and promised to come out of the sad emotion’s pain and trauma I had been going through. I had no idea how I was about to overcome to advance it out of life.
The past two years have been the biggest fight of my life; missing my passion for starting my work, I knew it wouldn’t be easy, but I had no idea just how hard it would be. It would push me into episodes of massive stress and severe health challenges. All I could feel the loneliness, a lot of struggle and a whole bunch of loss. But that’s when something shifted. I had a dream about a book with white empty pages with no word. I could see my picture in the book, and I quickly realized that this was my story and my book. I gave myself no choice to write that book through the journal and put everything and anything onto the pages. To let go of every deep, dark part of my struggle and journey. I kept reading it, again and again, So, I retold the stories to myself, I held onto from a more compassionate perspective. It began to heal, and the thing’s started to change steadily.
Whatever life throws at you, there is a reason the people you meet and develop a relationship with, circumstances you come across.
No one had taught me otherwise, and so the universe stepped in with beautiful lessons I could learn from myself gradually move. The universe heard my soul cry for help and found opportunities to teach. But until I was ready to learn I was ready to transform. By switching my practice from destructive to self-awareness and self-accountable, I released the toxic relationship people out of my life. I was able to free myself of the burdens my soul knew I did not have to carry it any longer because, I was honest and kindhearted.
In the whole process, I did not blame anyone; I took responsibility for my life and had no idea how it would change my life. But, the more I could understand myself, the better I could heal the people out there just like me seeking for a help. People out there just like me waiting to light up their tunnel. I quickly realized that I was not alone in this journey like I had felt I was all along. I realized that I had a gift to share,
Sharing my story with the world and help others and stand up for another
Women who need help. My transformation journey filled me with gratitude, light, and love. It has given me a new type
Of determination and hunger inside to help others. It has given me a gift, a
Calling, and a purpose in life. Now I can see and understand that gift was
The reason it all had to happen. All of the pain. All of the struggle. The
Fight to survive. I had to fall. I had to break to
Pieces. I had to rebuild everything to kick start my career. I had to
Do it moreover to improve my relationship.
So, I sit here today, typing out this post. It’s another day I’m
Grateful to have woken up. It’s another day that I’m thankful that I made it.
It’s another day that I’m HERE.
Two years of becoming more assertive, two years of becoming strong, two years of hope, and two years of loving myself and my LIFE.
Discovering women empowerment as my true mission.
